The international dial code for Amsterdam is ++31 20...................................... so call the HOME page

My first trip to Amsterdam was way back … when I was a green horned runny nosed semi-teenager. I blew it.. smoked it, it blew me & it more or less sucked!…. Now a' days when there, I actually remember much of what went on & what was on for me. This town is a blast (as in mental mind fuck), so much appeal, energy & world flavour 'A melting pot'. Every thing is skinny funny & beautiful. The last remaining anonymous city in Europe opens up it's passages to you to come & savour. This is a tough, fast & cool city full of wise guys, cool dolls, water & life wherever you find yourself looking............ Public Transport tips.

The Nieuwmarkt or De Waag (the scales) if you chose to use this as your entrance point to the city… weigh more or less by the time you leave. Public executions were performed here also… not so long ago.. Inside this landmark on the top floor is a virtual reality Anatomy Theatre. Out side & all around it.. you may choose from many avenues & treat yourselves to some of the wildest streets your ever going to grace. ................................ ..............................................................So lets get on with it..

no self-respecting Aboriginal would open of a Monday! Now u may think that all the places on this map are well researched…. & they are....................................................................................

-The first five star hostel- The Bulldog Hotel, Jump in at the deep end.. On the canal bank slap in the main red light district.

  Hostel list.. Bulldog Hotel Meeting Point Cosmos Hostel Aroza Hostel Bobs Youth hostel Hotel Plantage Hotel Hortus Brian Hostel Bed & Coffee

The Red light 'De Wallen' or 'De Walletjes' is that a woman? or 'your wallet yes!'… less!!, The Zeedijk or Zombie town 'de vliegende Hollander' as Freddy called it. If you're the type that gets paranoid after a smoke, then go later or sooner. Chinatown offers some delightful deals on some good food & very unique street watching possibilities. & Don't loose your load by leaving your wad hanging out of your pants! & if you leave it sticking out of your back pocket then your defiantly asking to get fucked!..................................................

Café Sound Garden Big pub with a huge hot summer terrace. & anything but house or cRap!! . . . . . . .

................................................................................................Legend has it that the first fishermen erected their shacks in 1125 & played around with them until….. Work began in the 17th Century. This Amsterdam rose up out of the mud. The canal Bridge on South Keizersgracht & Reguliersgracht has, if you look one way the count is 14 bridges in one eye full, if you look the other direction, there are less! At the time of print there were around 1,297 bridges in the city & so far 74km of man-made canal basin or water ways. Every stretch of which has it's own mood & surround… To navigate this town, look at the map with your eyes unfocused (that should be easy enough). You will see the spiders' web that it is. Everything is 20mins walk away (Oh nO, not walking again!!), just take your lines of latitude & longitude with you & try stay vertical if you are not already horizontal. There is a lot to see'n'do…....................................................................................... ... Hotel .... Hortus, Clean bright house, neighborhood parks, flower 'Hortus' gardens, zoo, canals etc.. Free tea &. . . . . . . . . . . Cafe de Pont... . . Beautiful building & a very unique spot... . 2 large open fresh air terraces, a spacious lounge . .

1634 Tulip mania sweeps the nation…. The great Tulip blight crash of 1637… 'Known locally as the day the bulb blew'. Thankfully they are back to full colour & bloomin' great. Get out to the Haarlem train station from there u can rent a bike (if u have one already then bring it with) this enchanting area takes in flowers, beaches, windmills & many quaint points to stop. Go direction Leiden which is 29km cycle, there u can board the train back to town (if you still want to).. Do this the other way around if you wish, either way you still won't find a hill to go up, down or over! .................................................................................................................................

..................................Canal bus.. The best value is to catch the morning ride Canal paddle boat rental also available if you prefer to take it at your own pace..................

Scheepvaartmuseum (maritime) this tall Dutch race were not content with being able to look over things but they set sail to look things over very early in history. For example it was Dutchman Abel Tasman who 'discovered' Tasmania in 1642, now tell me that ain't a karma thing! Pieter Minuit bought Manhattan from the Injuns in 1626 for 24$. The VOC-Dutch East Indian Co- ship is now moored up outside having first sailed in 1748, that as this is & was a trip! ...................................................Dare 2 Wear. Modern jewellery sales & display. Hygienic Piercing &.....

GRAND CAFÉ RESTAURANT "DU LAC", Incredible place - very big, very spacious place, Cool decorations, weird numerous lamps, some wooden parts from an .................................

.................................................................Eat Mode, Just opposite the sacred Chinese temple & portions of stylish fusion.
So the national dish of Pea soup & raw herring with spring onions… Sounds great mmmm? If you don't try it you will regret it for the rest of your life. If you do try it ……. …….!! Mr. Willem Beukelszoon invented herring in 1385,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,....... . Foodism, Here the focus is on the bread & not the paper kind! ............................................................. . . ......................Franken & KoK New, old style…. Neigh .. Timeless 'brown' café. A ......................................................................................................................................................................Wonder Bar . . . . Street side café bar. Bay windows & a terrace, Still welcoming smokers to enjoy Club royalty!.Basically this is your classic party place. Every one there has come to drink, dance & find someone to flirt . . . . . . . . Occii, Large former squat .. Much more than just a place..it`s about people, who . ............................................... . ..

..If you have not yet managed to quench your thirst for water, then there are beaches near by… & strangely enough serve as some of the only straight lines you will see in the otherwise topsy-turvy Amsterdam structures. If your into parks, you definitely gotta' go over & round Vondelpark 42km of roll around, be that on your bike or on the grass. Now that's what I call chillin'……. If u are the active type, Ajax football club arena is celebrating 100 years of kickin' balls.. There is also a multi media museum there to prove it.. You can get out there on the metro 'Arena'. www.amsterdamarena.nl.

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bar restaurant Wilhelmina Dok.. Not only is this the most impressive location in the city but the....

They "the good residents of Amsterdam" have their own pace of life here so take your time. Locals are willing & want to hang out (no disregard to the waving ladies in the windows) & shoot the breeze with you, unless of course if you are a complete Tulip! Note: Hemp products usually don't have any THC content so if you are trying to get stoned with it…(i.e. don't eat your T-shirt, shoe laces or writing paper)… You will be waiting a long long time to float your boat!..............................................................................

................The Hemp Hotel, A comfortable, colourful Indian style bar............................................................On (according to spell check the closest English word is 'Seedy'….. Is that a thesaurus or regular?) Zeedijk street (Sea dyke) the first hostel was established in the 16th Centaury at # 1 as a resting place for the exhausted sailors before they left town to set sail again.. & face more sea dyke's & octopussies…............................................................

Café Amsterdamned, Every night they host a happy hour between 22:3o and 23:3o with 2-4-1. Sunday & Mon - all . . . . . . . . .. . .. . . . . . ...............

..................Market days.. The Albertcupyp is the most diverse option no matter what it was that you were after. Over in the Waterlooplein it's the flea market you heard about. The Singel canal holds the international floating flower markets. You could also check out the Philatelist on Nieuwezijds Voorburgwal Wednesday & Sat. The books on het Spui is a Friday affair. If you desire to purchase something & you don't find it among the A'dam markets…. Then it probably doesn't exist yet…! You may also pick the deal of a life time on many different versions of things you didn't know existed.
.........................................................................................................Bed & Coffee Hostel, A friendly, simple, bright & colorful place for you!...................Maloe Melo Live blues rock club... front room with lotsa' space & nice price pints all round. Back 2 the back room where its all .................................................

Zipper vintage boutique, .. a paradise :) girls!!! :).. Two crazy second hand shops...it`s the gist of A`dam free spirit & unpampered soul..

.............................Nemo, Oosterdok 2 www.e-NEMO.nl The ultimate technological science centre.. Float in & buzz around with all sorts of mind-boggling laws of nature defying gadgets, bits'n'bobs, atom splitting fun etc etc..
The Amsterdam Historical Museum , showing the lifeline & roots (in the mud) of how this particular shroom came about & up since it's moist past. There are exhibition pieces dedicated to everything regarding the past, present & future of this immensely interesting & active town.
Hey not forgetting to mention the Rijksmuseum on Jan Luijkenstraat . Celebrating for the most part, the 'golden age of Europe as a hole' in glorious full colour. Here you will see the original versions of paintings you have always known but from where? If it's our birthday they treat you special at most pay in sights.. If you are dying to spend too much time & money then the Anne Frank house, Prinsengracht 263 is the place.
If you gotta' take a leak\slash\whiz\jimmy\pee\piss & there is no where else except the obvious.. don't do it. In them there canals live Bilharsia (in latin Schistosoma) eels. So feel free to go into the police station toilets & be thankful you entered under your own steam!!

La Tertulia ...Bright conversation filled coffee shop, located on the beautiful Prinsengrachtcanal........................................................................................................... ................................................VLAAMS CULTUURHUIS "DE BRAKKE GROND", An Open House… A Venue, (the only one!) where the full spectrum of art & . . . . . .

.........Plantage Hotel, A bit like old fashioned place… The rooms are big, bright, with balcony . You can smoke whatever ..................................................Magic Mushroom Gallery, "Magic products", the largest of the smart head shops. 7 strains of ...............................................................................................................................................................................................

..................Smoking if not sure, feel free to ask the dude that is offering it to you regarding the effect. It's tough to get a good hash; it's all imported & bought by some government representative in a tie who doesn't smoke! The Erb' is grown here & they have fun with mixin' seeds & bright lights to create something very… Amsterdam. So now u know.. Strong huh? .................................The Pollinator Company , The inventors of the pollinator & the ice-O-lator method, tried & tested…. Curious?…....................................................................... ...................

........................................................................(for example: unwritten laws say that red lights… for bikes do not really count). If it's not already painfully obvious that you are a bloody tourist, then maybe you can hang your baseball cap on the 'this a rented bike' sign at the maiden head of your bike. You could also; as the locals do & just hop on the first lacksadaisically locked bike you see & off you go…… Think once, think twice, think bike!! ............................. ...................................................................MacBikes Rentals. Amsterdam is # 1 bike town in Europe. The whole city is designed .......... In their own words…"the lines between those who conceive an idea and those who carry it out are blurred, and ....... Esperanza Hotel service. . . . Hostel & hotel bookers. They can find anyone anytime anywhere some place to stay. Also . . . . .
With public transport you get there by bus 82 from Amsterdam and then ask the bus driver to warn you for the stop at Ruigoord village.

If you're into having a good deep root……… Gemeentearchief, that is the archives. Open Mon-Fri till 17.oo, Amsteldijk 67

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Big thanks & recognition going out to Mr. Patrick Che the head on the bed, to Fred for being Fred T & all he did, Juan PG for enthusiasm & help ,,Hector & suzi 4 a great big smile. Designs were made by Kuci as usual… X G'sky..